Month: March 2015

go home winter, you’re drunk.

As mentioned in my previous post, I have a deep disgust for snow. Sunday night however, the universe decided it would only be appropriate if on the anniversary of my first year in Chicago, I would slip on a big pile of ice and fall down the stairs.

Let me break this down for you, black ice is a sneaky mother f-er. It’s as if Satan just Alex Mack’d himself and turned into an invisible pile of hardened water so that he could have a front-row seat at your painful and humiliating death. It’s THE WORST.

Since moving here, I’ve witnessed a number of people slip and fall on ice and I’ve always dreaded being one of them. I may have laughed uncontrollably at them when it happened, but that was only a natural instinct, I truly felt bad for them. For this reason, I always take tiny steps when near snow or ice or puddles or whatever. I may look like a total freak, but it beats falling on your ass. This, I now know first hand.

The other night, as I was getting home from my weekend job (a topic for another day), I saw my life flash before my eyes as I slipped and fell down these demon stairs:

I slipped on ice at the top right after I pushed open the gate & fell all the way down onto that even bigger pile of ice at the bottom 😦

I’m now literally afraid to go in or out through the back of my apartment until winter is over and done with. I’m completely traumatized. The back of my apartment is a freaking ice rink & I am NOT a fan of skating. Check it out for yourself:

For an entire week it hurt to walk, sit, get up, you name it. If it wasn’t for all the down feathers in my puffer coat, the pain would be much worse, but it was scary nonetheless. There was no one around that late at night and I just pictured my frozen, lifeless body being found the next morning. Super tragic.

What I really need is for that stupid groundhog to get out of his cave & make this winter disappear. The sun needs to shine the shit out over Chicago and melt all this dumb snow so that we can all get on with our lives and frolic the streets sans coats and have endless drinks on sidewalk patios and wear skirts and shorts and tank tops and sandals like normal human beings! Enough with this winter nonsense already! It’s freaking March people! I can’t take it anymore!

Rant over. Thank you for letting me vent.

xo

one year later..

Although it’s all still a little unreal, today is my one-year anniversary of living in Chicago!

Exactly 365 days ago I flew into a city wrapped in a blanket of snow on a weekend where the snow came down for days, and I never looked back –that’s a lie. I look back all the time, but I truly am happy I risked it all to move here. NO RAGRETS.

Anyway, as I look back at the year that has come and gone, I can’t help but reflect on my time here and think of all the new things I’ve learned –and not learned. So I’ve decided that I would share my observations with you because, Suzie Says.

1- As nice as Midwesterners are, (they are VERY nice) when it comes to the L, there is no such thing as personal space. The train is a special place where you spoon strangers in the early morning hours on your way to work, stare uncomfortably at the person standing less than inch away from your face, and accidentally touch things you had no intention of touching –you know, hands, butts, thighs, you get the picture.

2- While in Miami shots of tequila are customary, in Chicago whiskey is the poison of choice –and if you’re really unlucky, it’ll be Malort. gag*

3- I will never, not laugh whenever someone slips on black ice. It’s a natural reaction to what I’ve just been lucky enough to witness and I will not apologize for it. I will ask if you’re okay though –as I continue to laugh uncontrollably.

4- With so many incredible places to eat in the city, it truly amazes me that people still go to McDonald’s. I live across the street from a McDonald’s and I think I’ve maybe stopped in twice out of pure desperation.

5- I’ve learned that girls here rarely ever have their nails done & that’s cool, but I will never abandon my mani/pedi ways. I just can’t.

6- Working 7 days a week is probably the worst idea I’ve ever had, but having zero debt is a great feeling.

7- Winter is what you make of it. You can sit around and complain about how terrible it is, or you can appreciate the little things –like a 25-degree day instead of a 5-degree day. It’s the little things guys. Embrace it, or just join me in my chant: Summer is right around the corner. Summer is right around the corner. Summer is right around the corner.

8- Although I try my best to follow #6, snow is still Satan’s vomit and I will always hate it. But what’s worse than falling snow? Mushy snow, slippery snow, puddles of snow, snow that hardens and turns into pure ice. I can really go on and on. Snow is evil.

9- Patio season is the best season.

10- I’ve learned that getting your groceries delivered beats having to go to the grocery store ANY DAY. Peapod is my best friend and I’m not ashamed to admit it.

11- Dating apps can actually be entertaining and also creepy and overwhelming, but you can meet decent people on there. However, I no longer recommend it to my Miami friends. I’m sorry I ever did, hah!

12- Living alone can be a bit scary, extremely quiet, and sometimes boring, but there’s nothing boring about dancing alone in your underwear to Milky Chance and I am beyond grateful for every chance I get to do that –even though I cry a little on every first of the month.

13- Making friends in unfamiliar cities isn’t easy. You have to put in lots of effort, but it beats not having a social life. I appreciate all the friends I’ve made since moving here.

14- Also, although it’s taken me about a year to accept, I’ve learned that you can’t hate someone for not being on the same page as you. Timing is everything, and it can also be a bitch. Sometimes people need to fully experience life before they’re able to reach a certain point so that they won’t resent you later. When that happens, you just need to walk away and let it be.

xo